Archive for the Category »Inspiration «

Excavation

24
Jan 2012

I spent the bulk of my weekend and many evenings last week cleaning. By cleaning, I mostly mean getting rid of things.

I continue to be amazed at how things can collect in corners and unused spaces. I started joking that things kept respawning. I’d clean out a space, only to find more stuff had materialized in the time it took to carry a load to the car. A life lived as fully as possible can lead to this sort of overflowing, I think. That’s what I tell myself when I’m being patient and loving, anyway, lol.

I wonder if ideas work the same way, at least for me. I’ve got a full mind, always have. I don’t do quiet well. I have speakers set up in my bathroom for podcasts while I shower. I listen to Pandora* while I exercise and am apt to knit in front of a great television show.**

I started practicing mindfulness and meditation many years ago and I’m always laughing at myself because there is so much going on in my head. Meditation is more like the me show. Now with less rumination and more random thought bubbles!

Ideas come slow for me, I’ve talked about that before. I wonder if it is a matter of unloading all the busy loud that usually goes on in my mind. I have to clear out the unused “oh don’t forget to”s and “oh hell why did I”s. I have to dig past the same old boring stories I tell myself and look for the stuff I’ve forgotten underneath. My creative mind works, it just lives in the bottom of a cave under a very tall mountain of stuff. My creative mind is apparently a dragon, hoarding its treasure and being very stingy about who’s allowed inside.

Well you know what? It’s the year of the dragon, motherfucker. I’m coming for you.

 

*http://www.pandora.com/#!/stations/edit/6509559808670288 (if you like folk music)

**I used to be one of those snooty anti-tv types. Then I discovered a show called Firefly. From there, I discovered that television has gotten significantly better than the last time I watched it. Now, I don’t feel at all wasteful watching shows like American Horror Story, Dexter, Doctor Who, and Psych. These are brilliant, witty stories written with amazing skill. I see it as research and actively study the story elements I admire in each. I guess I’m a born-again tv enjoyer!

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Win! A success story, less 10K

28
Nov 2011

Woohoo! I’ve hit the 50K mark (and change) for November writing, thus winning my sixth NaNoWriMo challenge. I actually won the thing while watching the Thanksgiving parade on mute. That was surreal, as it turns out. Huge balloons and dance routines with no sound? Just a bit Ood.

The book is not quite finished. I’m about halfway through the pivotal end scene. Horror and death will soon ensue. I’m looking forward to diving into it today, actually. Horror and death are fun to write. I often wonder what is wrong with me, then I shrug and get back to the killin’ (but only on paper. Yeah. Only paper.)

This was the fastest I’ve ever crossed the NaNo finish line. Looking back, I can think of a few reasons I flew through this novel with six days to spare. (Six days! Luxury.)

1. A writing habit. I had been writing daily, as you, invisible imaginary reader, know. I had been writing/editing nearly every day, possibly with weekends off, for at least a month or two before NaNo began. NaNo doesn’t really allow for days off, but all I had to do was add a couple days a week rather than shift from zero to seven.

2. The story. I had a story well underway by November. I’d written 15K, but more importantly, I’d done nearly all the world building and character research I needed to do already. I had an outline. The outline still had the “and them some stuff happens” 25-35K section, but I had a far better idea where I was going than I have in previous years. I even had something of an endgame in mind, though the endgame got pushed up to the end of the middle game and a different endgame was born. Kinda. This is how it goes, though, as you draft. Middle game. It’s a thing. I also had a real vision for the pacing and theme of the story, so I could always return to those things when stuck.

3. The midnight dash bump. No really. Two sets of word count in one day really do set me off right. I was double where I was supposed to be by the end of day one. It helps.

4. 2K per day. I aimed for that instead of the usual 1667. I read on Twitter that someone was aiming for that, in 500 word chunks. 4 500 word sessions is way less daunting than one 2K session. There were many days I hit 1500, then thought that 500 was so easy, might as well do that also. Worked really, really well.

5. Write ins. I didn’t make very many, due to certain spouses having the nerve to need to work late or something. Gah, don’t spouses know that writing maniacally with a bunch of other writers is more important than income?! Sheesh. However the ones I did get to helped me double my word count for the day.

6. I’ll confess to a small amount of racing with one of my NaNo buddies. I won, too, by about 12 hours. MWAHAHA.

7. Tea. Lots of tea. I can’t really eat as much pie as I would like these days, so went to the mall and treated myself to some tasty fancy teas. Then consumed them in mass quantities (quantiTEAS. See what I did thar?). Treating yourself is always a good thing, no matter how you do it.

8. Constant creative mindset. Even when I wasn’t writing, I kept the RadioMuse channel tuned. I heard a lot of static, but I kept listening. Occasionally something came through, and was beautiful. I was angsting about a certain plot point on Twitter, and the second I posted about it, the idea came to me. Keeping the creative juices flowing throughout the day really helped the story gain traction.

Don’t get me wrong, there were difficult sections. I’m convinced that 20-35K is the swamp of sorrows for first drafts. It’s like, the more you struggle, the faster you sink to your death. I don’t know why, but I’ve encountered the phenomenon enough times to know it isn’t unusual, at least for me. I’ve learned to take that section one word at a time, just keep slogging through, and eventually the magic will occur and there will be a path out.

I hope everyone is having a great end run toward 50K about now, or already validated and coasting on the high. Either way, see you on the flip side, NaNoEdMo. *shudder*

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Ideas

03
Oct 2011

Whenever I read about writing, I always read about people who have so many ideas they simply can’t record them all. They are so busy with ideas and people in their head, they can’t get it out fast enough.

I confess, I’ve felt some ugly jealousy with regard to writers with ideas. I don’t get them like that. I don’t wake up in the middle of the night with ideas (well, once I did, that’s gonna be a weird book). My muse isn’t as much a pretty lady wearing a toga as this:

I read about King’s muse in On Writing. He describes his as a cigar chomping dude in a basement. That image appealed to me for years before I finally stumbled on my own mental muse: a radio. A badly tuned, ancient radio.

Mostly I get static. Especially when I’m looking for a channel. I can spin the dials all I want but all I get is white noise (that’ s a thing, kids, use the googles. Man I’m old.) Every once in a while, when I’m driving or eating dinner or somewhere with no computer or paper, the dial will spin itself and BAM, I’ll find a station playing in my head.

There’s several channels broadcast via Radio Muse, but trust me, none of them are on all the time. Often, the wrong one is on at the wrong time. I panic whenever I’m needing ideas because I don’t get them like that. They aren’t there all the time, they are there when the radio feels like turning on. I get an idea when I’m reading about a Goldilocks planet (last year’s NaNo). I get an idea when my husband has a dream (NaNo ’09). I get an idea while getting tattooed (Worse Things). The ideas are sparse, badly formed and often before I can grab onto them they have slipped away and the radio is back to white noise again. Laughing at me, I think. That radio creeps me out.

All that said and bemoaned, I do get ideas. I’ve got a backlog of ideas now, even, many in messy first draft forms already. I’m so thrilled at this moment, because I actually have things to play with. Books to write. Books to edit. I can actually see myself finishing things and starting new things. The radio finally gave me enough to play with that I feel like I can be a Real Writer ™. I think once I am willing to listen, it gives up a little more each time. Which means I have to keep listening, even when I should be doing other things.

So if you see someone in a minivan lingering at a red light, just give me a little honk. I was probably listening to the radio.

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Quandary

07
Sep 2011

I have two projects underway now, both sadly suffering for my day job (and honestly, I took Sunday and Monday off–all work and no play and all that).

They are very different projects, editing one novel within an inch of its life and writing the first draft of another, much more carefully wrought novel. At least, I hope it is more carefully wrought. I do not want to do this level of editing a second time.

For Worse Things (the draft), I’ve been taking things very slow, limiting myself to a small word count with each sitting. I want to focus more on story progression and writing quality the FIRST time, so that when I go back through the story isn’t a hot mess. That has been going really well. I have about 15K now (need to update the word count widget). The book is fast paced and hopefully interesting. I’m struggling with each scene to make it the one I want, to deliver the story in a controlled way. I feel like I know my world, and my characters, and now it is a matter of unfolding all this information in the right order.

Waking Kiara is a lukewarm mess, and that’s after a major revision already. I can definitely see my progression as a writer from 2006 when I first wrote Kiara through to now. I hope in ten years I can say the same thing! I like the story, I LOVE the world, and I think I can fix her, but it is taking a lot of effort (and the awesome analog project board). On the plus side, she’s not a HOT mess anymore, just tepid. That’s doable.

But what is the quandary? I also have NaNoWriMo coming up fast! These two projects are super important to me, and I want to put my writerly energy into them whenever I can. At the same time, I am pretty committed to NaNo. It gets my mind jogged and my fingers typing, even in the worst of circumstances (my one losing year still gained me 20K, and that was on the heels of some MAJOR bad shit in my life).

So here is the question: what do I do? I’m tempted to work out the end of Worse Things, but if I keep my pace up I’ll be past the need for 50K by then. I have the option of sketching out a novel from Kiara’s world, centered around two of her sisters. I’m not sure what their story is yet, and I know that 50K won’t finish that story and I’d really like to FINISH SOMETHING. You know. Someday.

What do I do? I don’t know, but I’m hoping my ever patient and loving goddess Seshat might be holding the answer in her head and if I seduce her right, she’ll share with me.

(Unrelated: I had no trouble uploading gifs before, but all of a sudden gifs aren’t cooperating with WordPress. Wtf?)

 

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Done!

02
Sep 2011

Okay not really. But done getting the awesome analog board of awesomeness up and running. Let me tell you–this was a pretty good idea I had (with help from lots of tips online). I have a much better picture of the story’s faults now, and places I can cut/move/expand.

BEHOLD THE AWESOMENESS:

Okay well, maybe it doesn’t look all that awesome here, but I promise, it is awesome.

Also–please sign up for the NaNo Blogchain 2011! I’m just the humble host, but I think it is a great idea to have a clearinghouse of NaNo blogs. I’m hoping for a nice long list of folks so that when I need to procrastinate, I have a list of bloggers I can cheer on instead.

I need an idea for NaNo, pronto. One I can start and finish, because many of my NaNovels are sitting in unfinished states looking at me with frowny novel faces, and I can’t have that. I feel guilt.

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That’s Entertainment

27
Jul 2011

Being someone who attempts to craft a readable story, I find myself increasingly unhappy with gaping plot holes in fiction.

I wonder if learning to be a better writer (cause that’s me. Learning, not better necessarily…) makes me far more critical of stories than I would be in the past. I wonder if I’ve forgotten how to just jump in and enjoy a freaking twist and turn already. I can say I find more to criticize in visual media like movies and television than I do in books. But at the same time, there is a lot to like about television these days. I’m much more of a TV watcher now than I was several years ago, because there’s a lot more enjoyment to be had now.

Sometimes I just have to take pity on the writers. Check out this adorable twitter exchange (@stephen_moffat is the head writer on Dr. Who) (BEWARE SPOILERS):

I do like a writer that can have a sense of humor about his own plot holes. I only hope I can be so willing to accept criticism without angst someday.

The question remains–how big can the plot hole get before irritation ensues? I don’t know, but I do know it lies somewhere south of Voyager’s first season. Blech.

 

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Stories

25
Jul 2011

Several times in the last few days the subject of formative stories has come up around me.

Many of my dearest didn’t have the best childhoods. I seem to collect people who have spotty or downright abusive families. I also seem to collect people who read. Voraciously. It’s a writer’s occupational hazard I suppose.

We all have the same tale. We might not have had the best or most consistent moral compasses to follow, but we all had stories. All of us can point to many books and worlds that shepherded us from damaged or lost children into a whole adulthood (wholeish, anyway). We have memories of the teacher that picked us out of class and handed us a book on the sly, or told us to check in the scifi section of the library, or simply encouraged us to think critically about what we were fed, rather than accepting it without question. Where there was a dearth in our home lives, fiction and storytelling and passion for the written word stepped in to surrogate.

I’m not trying to bag on my own parents, or really any parents. Being a parent is a hard fucking job, and even the best of intentions can go awry when faced with the realities of the daily struggle to nurture and grow tiny people. If anything, my parents encouraged me to read and often provided me with trips to the library and books as gifts. That alone is a blessing.

I can tell you that I had parents of the normal sort, and I had spiritual parents too. Gene Roddenberry, Stephen King, Wendy and Richard Pini, Robert Heinlein, Ray Bradbury, Douglas Adams, Dr. Seuss… All these and more had a hand in my upbringing. Stories to this day govern the way I believe the world should look, how I conduct myself, how I treat others.

With the disappearance of Borders and the defunding of arts and libraries everywhere, I’m afraid for the lost children of the generations to come. I can only hope that they will find stories of their own to fill in their missing pieces. I’m a child of the digital age, and I don’t begrudge the shift toward ethings (I love my Kindle. Srsly.) I just hope that we remember to provide access to those who might not be able to afford high speed internet and an ereader. Because the lost children need stories–they need someone to help them find their way.

Today’s version of Can’t Talk, Reading is brought to you by The Book of Lost Things, by John Connolly. About a 12 year old boy on the cusp of adulthood, his tragedies, and the fairy tales that form his moral compass and guide him through. (I told you this keeps coming up for me! Total coincidence, I had this post half written when I bought the book. I think the universe is trying to tell me something.) Great read, just picks you up and carries you along until the end. I recommend it if you are waxing nostalgic about your own storied upbringing.

 

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Wordcount Achieved

21
Jul 2011

I think I’m high on success. Or at least, on doing something with forward momentum. I feel really good about putting words on paper.

Let me tell you about emo music. It is mostly really, really bad. I like Fallout Boy all right, but wow. There is screaming–lots of screaming. I fail to see the attraction to screaming into a microphone and calling it music. It gives me a headache, and makes me want to shake my fist and tell kids to get off my lawn. Which isn’t really fair, because I like all manner of music including very loud and inappropriate kinds. But this stuff is just CRAPPY.

Why am I doing this to myself? Because Caroline listens to emo music. She’s a 17 year old lesbian emo artist who can make demons come out of her neck. Her life, it’s going to get very hard in about 1000 more words. I feel bad for her, but I’m about to pretty much ruin her. I feel like I owe her something, and if I want to get to know her better, I should listen to the music that moves her.

I remember being 17, wasn’t that long ago damn it. Music helped define my emotional maelstrom, and I imagine it does for her too. Everything is so god awful Important when you’re 17, even the screaming obnoxious music that speaks to your deep and limitless soul. I might have written poetry at that age, but you’ll never know because I’ll NEVER show it to you.

Poor Caroline. I feel a tad guilty. But I think it is going to be a heck of a fun read, so not guilty enough not to do it. Heh heh.

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